Trials...ugh!

On the road to the promised land, the Israelites encountered every day stuff. Such as bickering children, deciding what to do with extra clutter, whose turn to do the dishes, laundry... and so on! Keeping you eye on the goal or the prize IS the trial. Going to war, the battle isn't the hard part- you are trained for that, what to shoot and at who. The hard part is keeping everyone on the same road as you are traveling there. (Are we there yet? I have to go to the bathroom! He's looking at me!!) UGH!!

Today my ex-husband and I met with a court appointed mediator. I knew what to say, as coached by my attorney, I knew how to make my view heard appropriately, but now the trial begins. The mediator wants to speak to the children. My Faith and Isaiah (13 and 11) are not extremely excited about this 2 year disturbance to their very important jr. hi. career! Needless to say, I am not quite sure how they will respond to this stranger, the mediator. (i imagine Arnold saying it- THE MEDIATAR)

My happy go-lucky, glass half full side thinks- God is full of miracles and likes the odds extremely against Himself to really show His glory in the final inning. But the doom- gloom, glass half empty, cracked and leaking badly thinks- oh no, I have missed God and now He's hiding far away from me!

What's really awesome regardless of my dual personality is that God stays ALWAYS CONSTANT!!! He will never be afraid, or confused about anything that appears that way to me. Oh Lord, I love that about you!!!

I can honestly say today, I have no idea whats gonna happen next! But I know who does know! That's whats most important!!

Shipwrecked, Imprisoned...Paul is that you?

I was praying today, and I began to understand a little something about waiting! The Lord showed me a glimpse into what Paul might have been feeling way back in 33ad. To know the plans the Lord has for you but stuck waiting on.... what? It can seem like such a waste of time. There are so many important places to go, people to see!! Come on God! You can't possibly want me to rot here in prison, or die in a shipwreck? What is going on? Why the delay?

Boy, Paul sure had a way better attitude than I would've had - or have today. It seems that the more excited I get about my trip to the great beyond, the more it feels like I am climbing uphill.

I have to take my ex-husband to court to get permission to take the kids for 2 years out of the country. He was appearing to be somewhat agreeable when I offered to make his life a little easier by stopping all child support arrears. And even to stop all future child support charges. But he is adamant now about not letting them go. I am truly sad! Just like a stop over in jail, like Paul? Well I may not be preaching about God against the law, but I do feel like this can't possibly be part of the plan! Or is it??

So many times there are little lessons that we need to learn, but so often we are consumed with the wasted time, we don't learn anything! Oh, Lord! Help my lack of faith, help me see what You are showing me, and above all God I need mercy! I am no Paul, you know!!!

Another year wiser!!!

Today I turned 43! Whoopie!! And I am positive it can only get better from this point on! With age comes wisdom and I am younger than some of my friends, and older than others but in all, no one can tell you what is right for you but YOU!! You have been in your head and body for 43 years( or longer Sylvia :) he he!!) That's a looooong time! I have learned what makes me comfortable and what makes me crazy and I actually try to avoid both, but tend toward being comfy!!! But no matter where I go, or what I do, I am the one that will have to live with my decision and consequences, so why would I do something dumb?? Boy, if my mom is reading this she is saying, "yeah, why?" So take a leap, a jump, a step, in your direction and LIVE, its YOUR LIFE!!!!